A family law attorney hears it all during the course of his or her business day, not to mention legal…
Prenuptial agreements are often the butt of many jokes. Stand-up comedians never lack fodder for their routines when this is…
Sadly the statistics don’t lie. It is estimated that some 40 to 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce courts these days. What can we attribute this to? Was the picking of a permanent partner more carefully thought out back in our parents’ day? Perhaps couples just agreed to disagree and kept a stiff upper lip and carried on with the relationship for the sake of the children. By the time the children were grown and out on their own, the polite air of civility was the norm and the relationship was comfortable, so the marriage continued until one or the other passed away.
Today though, our society seems less content to just be satisfied with making do in the relationship “until death do us part” and perhaps this accounts for the fact that nearly half of all marriages are doomed for divorce. Of course, there are the exceptions like needing to extricate oneself from a threatening relationship where domestic violence is present or when one’s spouse has addiction issues which seem unlikely to be resolved, even through counseling, thus, there is a resignation that divorce will be the answer.
Yet, domestic violence and addiction issues cannot account for all the divorces that crowd the family law docket these days. Why has the sanctity of marriage and a relationship that was so treasured become so seemingly disposable?
Sadly, the rate for marriage ending in divorce has escalated in the past few years/decades. Once upon a time people married and stayed together, through thick and thin, for life. Often, though there were irreconcilable differences, people stayed together for the sake of the kids as they knew the turbulence of divorce and the divisiveness that results is often difficult on the kids. But sometimes the relationship becomes intolerable and you seek an exit, vowing that you will not let the kids suffer the consequences of this faltered relationship.
The wedding plans are in motion and it seems that there are a million details to attend to before the big day. While you, ever the romantic, are pondering over what color butter cream roses should adorn the wedding cake, your intended tells you he has made an appointment for both of you to see a divorce attorney. “A divorce attorney?” you ask with a smirk on your face. “Why would we see a divorce attorney – we’re not even married!” “To get a prenuptial agreement in place” is the response. Immediately your eyebrows go up in a quizzical manner and you feel your mouth form a perfect “O” as you feel you might faint dead away.
While this scenario might sound like it straight from out of the afternoon TV. soap operas, it is a scene that happens more and more these days. In an age, where nearly half of all marriages eventually are dissolved, one can never be too prudent.
The mood is just right… a romantic, candlelight dinner for two in an elegant restaurant and when the dessert arrives, there is something much sweeter than the crème brulee, as the gentleman suddenly pulls a velvet box out of his chest pocket and pops the magical question to the woman. We’ve seen enough romantic movies to know that the question is “will you marry me?” After the young lady answers in the affirmative, suddenly there are a flurry of decisions to be made and many details to be dealt with before the big event.
But, should one of those details be putting a prenuptial agreement in place before the wedding day?
Nothing puts a kibosh on upcoming nuptials more than talking “prenup”, a word commonly used to describe a prenuptial agreement, or a “contract” that is created between two people before they marry. This prenuptial agreement may exist between two heterosexual individuals, or, a same-sex couple.
When you read the title of this post: “What is a Prenup?” you might have scoffed at the topic, thinking prenuptial agreements are just for the rich and famous and not applicable to everyday people. If a budding romance seems headed to marriage in the near future, you should check out some of the reasons why you might want to consider the practicality of a prenuptial agreement, rather than merely dismissing it as something that is irrelevant to your relationship.
Americans born Post-World War II between the years 1946 and 1964 are known as the baby boomers. They’re associated with rebellion, reeducation, and redefinition of traditional values. And with that redefinition of values has come a reworking of traditional marriage and divorce. Boomers are divorcing at a much higher rate than any generation before them, creating greater concerns for their futures. Now that the kids are out of the house, they find themselves reflecting more deeply on self, spouse, and the relationship between the two. Their concerns are now directed toward self fulfillment more than previous generations, and their self reflection has redefined retirement. Baby boomers are more likely to opt for partial employment in their retirement or starting over with new careers. But divorce can throw a wrench into retirement plans.
The costs of divorce can be huge and far reaching. When you’re younger, divorce can negatively impact children, and everyone in the family can have a tough time picking up the pieces. When you’re older, divorce can be a blow to retirement plans, and you might even find yourself retiring later or looking for a part-time job to supplement your income. Even if you’ve planned well for retirement, chances are you never planned on getting divorced in midlife or beyond. Questions arise regarding divorce pension rights, dividing retirement assets, and more. If you find yourself single now that you’re headed toward retirement, it’s vital that you regroup, reorganize, and rethink your finances in order to better plan for the reality of your new single life.
All our lives we acquire and lose things. We buy, we sell, trade and borrow. We spend all day at jobs to buy the things we desire. It’s not only physical things that we acquire however. We also acquire retirement plans, bank accounts, investments, and debts. We gain some of these things before marriage and some during. If and when these marriages come to an end assets must be divided between spouses. This is never easy and it’s important to understand your rights so that you receive a fair settlement. It’s wise to get a good understanding of exactly what the value of all these assets are and to hire some professionals such as an attorney and an accountant or actuary to help with this process.
Going through divorce means big changes for both parties. Daily life changes drastically, new lifestyles must be built, and assets must be divided. It takes a lot of planning and careful consideration in order to protect yourself and your fair share of your assets in divorce. There are many tricky things to divide up from homes and vehicles to bank accounts and retirement plans. Tricky or not, retirement plans are often one of the largest assets that couples have to divide in divorce and are therefore extremely important. In order to make sure that you are getting your fair share you’ll need to have a deep understanding of what you are legally entitled to as well as probably hire a qualified attorney to help you sort the matter out.